Wassup Jose

Alright, not quite sure where this post is going to go but what the heck. The project I am working on has a requirement for a workflow component. Hmm, not a big deal because we are going to use Windows Workflow Foundation right?

Screeech! Not so fast Ricky Racer … “Is there an echo in here?” Anyway, it turns out that Windows Workflow Foundation will not work for our project. We need to design (read from scratch) a workflow framework. Gman, where are you when we need you?

In addition to the workflow, we need to implement a message queue framework and a state machine. Nope, M$MQ and IBM MQ are out of the question. We need to do it the hard way and build our own. Lame! Enough said.

Not towel heads, toll heads! You know the ignorant drivers that know they are destined for a toll booth, but wait until they are parked in front of the toll operator to dig for the damn toll fee. Today a dumb toll head took 2:17 minutes to pass the toll booth, arrgh!

The toll booths were clear, so I decided to stay in the lane and follow the car ahead of me through the booth. I usually have to fight for the best position like Nascar. Wait, not so fast Ricky Racer. We need to complicate this process just to piss me off.

The driver rolled down her window (this was a clue I was behind a toll head), then she digs around in the cab for almost 2 minutes, and then finally pays the fee. Needless to say, I was pissed off. It took her what seemed like an eternity to get her ass out of the booth.

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Dammit! I lost my handy dandy iPod Nano. I searched the apartment, cars, and work place with no luck. I am confident it was lost at a client site, but nobody will report it found. I just have to admit that its gone … forever and ever and ever.

The iPod is a second generation Nano. Black anodized aluminum shell with 8GB of storage and over 1,000 songs. It was enclosed in a clear iSkin case with clip and screen protector options. It was in mint condition and now some sleazy mofo has the iPod.

I am working and listening to music, what a concept. However, this post is not about work or music in general. Instead, I just realized that I HATE Kanye’s voice and music. Yeah, he is an award-winning artist big deal. I cannot listen to his crappy music at all. Arrgh!

I think Jay-Z is in the same league. He had a couple of hot tracks earlier in his career, but the crap he is putting out now is just that … crap! They must think that they are invincible in the game. Whatever. I won’t listen to their music.

The whiner Milkman got his feelings hurt and requested the blog be blocked. Well, I find it interesting that someone named iHateMilk2 posted a comment to the blog from within the blocked network (verified).

Blocking a site will NOT prevent access. If you knew as much as you claim you do about the web and technology, you would know this moron. You can always request to block all HTTP traffic you control freak.

I log all access to this site and see hundreds of requests from the network throughout the day. Not to mention the email and other communication I receive from your fans. I forgot to mention communication from your “friends”. Nice!

Look! Someone claiming to be the Milkman stopped by and left us a comment. Jealous of you? I hardly think so you a!*hole! You have so many f*cked up qualities that I am not sure where to start.

Let me count the ways: You are a f*cking control freak, you and your crappy VB.NET code suck major ass, you are a legend in your own mind, and you are an unethical idiot. The EO and the other moron saved your ass.

How does it feel to be hated by so many people? Now, I hear that you are kissing major ass and some bullshit about you not being financially ready to transition off the project. Also, I hear you are so desperate for work that you applied for a developer position!

Do not worry, I have let my friends, collegues, and network of professionals know that you will be on the market soon. My recommendation, never hire this f*cking idiot period! I used your name of course, no need to thank me.

Ironically, you stated several times that this is the best project in your career. WTF?! You are a loser, I have worked on larger and much more complex systems. FYI, I am currently employed by a Microsoft Worldwide Partner as a Senior Architect.

My first project, a National credit card company biatch! You will never see the light of this caliber project, because you are a f*cking moron and posses the soft skills of a rock. Thank you for stopping by, now keep out.

It is only appropriate that I add a counter to countdown the time until the Milkman is gone and on the street! The team members that should have stayed on the project left, but the ones that suck and soured the project are still on the project. Nice.

Once the counter reaches zero, I am sure many people will rejoice and partake in acts of merriment. When is the other moron leaving the project? Yes, I am referring to the derelict project manager. Here morons, a parting picture just for you.

I have a recurring pain in my calf and foot. It started aching about two weeks ago, but I did not pay too much attention to it. Now, I limp up and down the stairs and have to stop and take breaks after short distances. What the heck it wrong?

Yeah, I can hear the hecklers now … cause you are getting old. You are so old, your social security number is 000-00-0001. You are so old, when god said let there be light you flipped the switch. I get it, but I think it is something unrelated.

What does this mean? I think I might be out of the race in September. Last night, I went to the gym and walked 5 minutes and then ran for another 10 minutes. The pain was horrible, it felt like the nerves and muscles were ripping apart. Argh!

I started a new job today. I was not expecting much on the first day other than the typical employee orientation and paperwork. I was right. Also, I got a new laptop and I spent most of the afternoon installing and configuring software.

While I was configuring the software, I could hear a team discussing business object design, project objectives, etc. The team continued with TFS panels for team based code reviews, lazy-loading, and test plans. It brought tears to my eyes.

I am a member of various forums and joined to both contribute and learn from others. One thing I need to realize is there are some lazy mofos that will never get it! For example, I am a member of Digital Point and found this post in the programming section.

The poster asks how to create PHP websites with a template engine and cited Smarty as an example. First, did the poster visit the Smarty site and read the documentation? My guess is no, he or she is a lazy mofo that wants others to do all of the work.

Other members respond with links to the Smarty crash course and sample application. Nice enough considering this was a stupid question, but we need to help the newbies. The lazy poster should thank others for their responses and move forward, right?

Here is where I get pissed: The original poster thanks the others for their replies, but has the nerve to restate that he or she does not know how to use Smarty and needs help! I am fed up with all the lazy members! RTFM (Read The F* Manual).