Gonna Love My Nuts
Vince "ShamWow" Shlomi, where are you? I think it would be appropriate for you to author this post. Some man gave himself a DIY circumcision using ... *drum roll* ... nail clippers. Yup, the dickhead is a couple tips short of a brain. Damn, some people are "stuuuuuupid"!
You Decide
Most know that I have been checking out the iPhone and related wares. There are tons of great looking games and productivity applications, but there are twice as many losers. Here is one in the latter category. Yup, the iSnort application.
Weight Loss Secrets II
I am no diet guru, but I do know that eating anything listed on This Is Why You're Fat is on the "Do not eat list". Also, I am willing to bet that these foods will pack on several pounds and send you straight to the crapper. Pizza lovers, enjoy!
Guitar Zero
Check this out. I stumbled onto Guitar Hero Broke My Knee.com. I did not read the entire story, but I am guessing the domain owner is claiming Guitar Hero caused him to break his knee. He even wrote a letter to Red Octane asking for an endorsement.
Hmm, I should follow his lead and register McDonalds Made Me Fat.com. and write a letter to their marketing team asking for an endorsement and cash prizes. I have zero ads on this blog, but may consider posting the Golden Arches for a small nominal fee. Ha!
Cameltoe Shoes?
I saw a woman at lunch, which was wearing cameltoe shoes. Am I seeing things, because no shoe manufacturer would want to be the butt of the endless jokes. Well, guess what? This cameltoe shoe aka Rift was developed by Nike. Do the socks bunch up around the toe?
Pets and Science
Have you ever had a favorite pet that you loved like a part of your family and then they up and died on you? Well thanks to science you don't have to put up with that pesky heart break you might experience after such a loss. You broke your pet of that bad habit of pooping on the rug, you can break them of that nasty habit of leaving you by dying. That's right science shows us that your dog is just a bunch of DNA! So, when your pet kicks the bucket you don't have to have that tough talk with the kids... you just pick up your clone and your pet is good as new! Sure you will have to train them again, but you can give them cute names like Sparky 2.0 or Mr. Snuggles the Third! For more information on how to pick up your pet clone visit www.bestfriendsagain.com. Watch out for these other services coming soon... Mom and Dad Forever and Grandparents Never Die! Or why settle for raising your kids once when you can experience the joys all over again. Did your child end up a total nut job? Well now you can fix it, by being a better parent for their clone! Why should God get to have all the fun, when science can put you in control of your own life... or... lives?
Hey Kool-Aid!
Kool-Aid and Reebok join forces to produce Kool-Aid scented shoes! I for one think it is a silly idea, but I am sure peeps are sporting these kicks at school or work, nice! Yo, wanna smell my feet?
Car-azy People …
Another weird one. Most expensive Hot Wheel car ever is valued at a kewl $140,000 dollars. The toy car is cast in 18k gold and is detailed with more than 2,700 diamonds. All of this to celebrate the brand's 40-year history. I think it is a LAME idea, but what do I know?
Chicken News
Okay, here we go ... weird chicken stories. A woman dies trying to rescue a dead chicken and police arrest man choking chicken. Bruahaha!
Wait, look what I found on As Seen On TV ... Crazy Cluck The Wacky Chicken! Only $19.95 plus S/H. Nice!
Who is under your bed today?
Okay, people are crazy and stupid! I just read that a couple in North Carolina were lying in bed, when they heard rumbling underneath the bed. The woman has a dog; could it be her dog underneath the bed? Hell no!
When she looked underneath her bed, she saw someone staring back at her. Boogie Man is REAL!! Nope, it was not the boogie man. Apparently, the man under her bed broke into her apartment hoping to see her naked.
The good news is the woman's boyfriend got to smack down on the loser before the police arrived at the apartment. Where is Zed? I want to see Zed beat this loser with the heel of his shoe!